We can't always have what we want in life and be happy. Happiness isn't always served to you on a silver platter. I've been broken so many times before and I'm not going to give up being happy anymore. I'm sorry. People may think all of this is lust, but I know it myself what i'm feeling is love. Real friends stand by you and respect the decisions you make. Irritated and dissappointed. So much for being brothers.